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A dog is usually man's best friend

Tweets of the week

Quote of the week

‘I like walkouts. Walkouts are weakness leaving the building’ Andrew O’Neill.

Tweets of the week

My Nephew didn’t get the A levels he wanted so I told him that on my results day I got three Es and took them all to celebrate getting into a really good university.
— Gary Delaney is on tour now (@GaryDelaney) August 18, 2022

math teacher: you're below average

me: that's mean

teacher: *sighs* no, no it isn't
— Adam Cerious (@Browtweaten) August 15, 2022

An oxymoron, surely? pic.twitter.com/A910DEkFI6
— Stephen Fry (@stephenfry) August 17, 2022

[Ancient Roman to little girl]
"So, what’s your name?"
"Ivy"
"And how old are you?"
"Same"
— Moose Allain (@MooseAllain) August 19, 2022

Dogs are man’s best friend unless they’re drug sniffing
— mark normand (@marknorm) August 18, 2022

I haven't got a pot to piss in.

I've got a colander but I'm not using THAT again
— Sanjeev Kohli (@govindajeggy) August 17, 2022

Three stages of career development are: I want to be in the meeting, I want to run the meeting, I want to avoid meetings.
— Kate (she/her/hers) (@Katiohead) August 17, 2022