Tweets of the week

Tweets of the week

I'm currently trying to sell a thermos with absolutely no capacity for any liquid. It's a tankless flask.

— Paul Eggleston (@pauleggleston) August 18, 2020

The tensest crowd I’ve ever been was at the funeral of the man who invented the Jack-in-the-box.

— Gary Delaney (@GaryDelaney) August 19, 2020

Been learning how to guess the weight of dogs - picked up a few pointers yesterday.

— Olaf Falafel (@OFalafel) August 17, 2020

I told my kids the shoes on telephone wires are from kids who lied and got sucked up into space

— Mom Jeans (@momjeansplease) August 20, 2020

Gavin Williamson refuses to quit over exam results shambles, despite many suggesting his desk needs to go through clearing.

— Have I Got News For You (@haveigotnews) August 18, 2020

Size of this baby. pic.twitter.com/twbrVJV4eT

— Flanjo (@Annjj) August 20, 2020

Published: 21 Aug 2020