Victoria Emes writes Welcome To Motherhood, Bitches:

Instagram comedian's frank guide to pregnancy, birth and parenthood

Instagram comedian Victoria Emes has written a humorous guide to pregnancy and motherhood.

Her book, Welcome To Motherhood, Bitches: The Real Guide to Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond, will be published on February 17.

Emes told her 162,000 Instagram followers: ‘Let me tell you, getting 80k words out my brain was more laborious than squeezing 8lb of flesh through my flaps.

‘It’s a brutally honest (and hopefully helpful) guide to becoming a parent and explores the lesser spoken physical, emotional and mental aspects of pregnancy, birth and the postpartum period.

‘You know, shit like; your nipples might end up looking like digestive biscuits, your anus may develop haemorrhoids the size of oranges, you might shit yourself giving birth (true story), you might cry continuously for seven days after labour, you might lose all body confidence when your tits resemble wind socks, you might dread ever entertaining a penis inside your suitcase of a vagina again, and you might experience loneliness like you’ve never felt, and OBVS more fanny jokes than you can shake your vulva at.’

Publisher Harper Collins add that the book ‘is a reassuring reminder that feeling slightly (or shockingly) out of control with a newborn baby human is entirely normal.’