Tweets of the week

Quote of the week

Tweets and other posts of the week

J.Lo is great shorthand for Jennifer Lopez, but it's not something you should try if you're Pete Doherty.

— Danny Wallace (@dannywallace) December 17, 2022

Bill Oddie can be a bit annoying, but his wife Mel's pretty sound.

— Neil (@_Enanem_) December 18, 2022

I knew she was a ghost the moment I saw her walk through the door.

— mariana Z (@mariana057) December 22, 2022

Who should be in charge of twitter?

— Moose Allain (@MooseAllain) December 19, 2022

More than 50% of Badminton is admin.

— Alan Machnik (@Alan_Machnik) December 21, 2022

My son gets anxious about the school Nativity, so he always plays a sheep

But you can’t wrap your kids in cotton wool forever

— Claire Oliver (@Claire_Ollie) December 19, 2022

opening a postmortem manicure business and calling it "nails in the coffin"

— Village Person (@SvnSxty) December 22, 2022

And an oldie but a goodie…

The four wisemen gave Jesus gold, frankincense, myrrh and nickel but Jesus gave the nickelback and that guy never made it as a wiseman

— Cameron Loxdale (@Cloxdale) December 5, 2019

Published: 23 Dec 2022