WTF: Weekly Trivia File

• ‘My wife is under no illusion that I’m anything special.’ Tim Minchin.

• Stephen Merchant has apologized after reportedly shunning a place on a Walk Of Fame being installed… in Bristol Zoo. The comic was one of 50 names chosen by the public – including Bill Bailey, incidentally – to be immortalized on the memorial. But after zoo chiefs heard nothing back from repeated requests to use his name, they had to leave the last plaque was left empty. However it seems the message never got through to the Office co-creator – who only learned he had spurned his home town when he got an call from his upset mum, who’d read about it in the local paper. ‘I didn't know anything about it until my mum read  [it] in the Evening Post,’ he said. ‘She was very upset about it because she is very proud of Bristol, as I am. When she rang I was a bit shocked and cross I had missed out.  I really don't want people in Bristol thinking I have got too big for my boots.  I am incredibly proud of my Bristol roots. Not only would I have been delighted to have a plaque at the zoo this year I'm angling eventually to have a statue of me next to Cary Grant in Millennium Square.’ Merchant will now be added to the zoo wall sometime next year.

• Fan of the Royal Wedding: Rowan Atkinson, who’s on the Westminster Abbey guest list for Friday. No fan of the Royal Wedding: Ed Byrne, who had to cancel his show in Aberdeen on Friday as most of the 600 tickets have gone unsold after people chose to watch the Royals instead.

• Jo Brand and Sean Lock have taken part in a 500-yard mud run course across the bed of the River Blackwater in Maldon, Essex – which was filmed for a travel show Brand is making for Dave .

• Elaine Williams was hardly a shining example of comedy genius on Britain’s Got Talent. And here she is before the TV experience – inexplicably not being booed off by the audience of the Manchester Comedy Store:
  

• 'Whimsy is the last refuge of the impotent.' Tommy Tiernan

• A statue of Les Dawson in his home town has had to go in for repair – after too many adoring fans hugged it. Ther adulation caused the memorial to wobble on his base – causing a potential health and safety issue. A council spokesman in Lytham St Annes, Lancs, said: 'People put their arms round Les to have their photos taken and they get scared when he moves. We have used cement to pack it up but a permanent repair is required.' Fittingly, the first attempt to take the memorial away for repair ended in farce. It was lifted into the air on a hoist, but then abandoned as it was too heavy for the van the workers had brought.

• Tweets of the week:
  Jonathan Ross: I tried to make a joke about Martin Luther King going fishing that ended "I have a bream". My wife said it was rubbish and I must stop it.
  Jacques Aih: When the band were arguing amongst themselves, one well-meaning member would say "Look guys, remember, there's no I in Lynyrd Skynyrd"
  Paul Kerensa: The internet in Newcastle is available via wi-i-fi.

SOURCES: Sunday Telegraph, Bristol Evening Post, Daily Telegraph/Irish Herald, The Sun, The Sun, Toronto Globe and Mail, Daily Mirror, Twitter