Diane Chorley: Duchess Of Canvey
Note: This review is from 2015
Back in the day, Diane Chorley used to run a nightclub in Canvey Island. The Flick was patronised by all the celebrities, from Shane Ritchie to Pat St Clements; Boy George to Michael Barrymore. David Bowie is credited with giving her the Duchess nickname.
She was like a mother to them, she tells us, albeit one who also catered for their pharmaceutical needs, which lead to a spell at Her Majesty’s pleasure from which she has just emerged. So accompanied by her minder/fella Ron (who’s implacable demeanour could well have made him the third of Hale & Pace’s Rons, since we’re in an Eighties vibe) she has decided to put the house band back together and regale her fans with stories and songs from the old days.
This is no exaggerated drag act, but a credible character of a steel-edged brassy Essex matriarch, astutely observed. Her band, The Buffet, is also era-perfect, from the androgynous New Romantic on keyboard to the rolled-up jacket sleeves of the guitarist.
But downplaying any caricature means too many opportunities for gags have been lost, especially as script doesn’t exactly zing with gags, the occasional malapropism aside. It’s assumed - wrongly – that mildly amusing fictions of D-listers of 30 years ago got up to is enough.
This performance also makes it difficult to build a ‘never mind the gags, just party’ cabaret attitude, and the Latitude audience generally sit and politely listen to the numbers, which include a slightly lounge George Michael cover version. Only at the end when she gets into the crowd and almost physically urges them to get up and dance is their really any energy in the performance.
The cover aside, Ms Chorley’s other parodies are so pitch-perfect that they could be lost album tracks from the era. But it’s mere replication of the sound – especially an alleged Gloria Estefan number – but it’s not especially funny. Another song channels Ian Drury, but only in tone, it falls far short of the lyrical wit of the original artist.
As with the persona of Chorley herself, being perfectly realised is only half the story. We need gags too…
Review date: 18 Jul 2015
Reviewed by: Steve Bennett