Tweets of the week

Posts of the week

The Reckoning, the new BBC drama about Jimmy Savile, is framed via an interview he does late in life interlaced with flashbacks from his career. So it is essentially now/then/now/then.

— Frizident Evil (@FrizFrizzle) October 9, 2023

Andy Murray would never take me on at tennis because he knows I’d embarrass him. Not with ability but my general etiquette and behaviour around the club.

— Josh Pugh (@JoshPughComic) October 10, 2023

Husband: The doctor said I should touch myself whenever I feel like it.

Wife: No.... He said you could have a stroke at any time!

— mariana Z (@mariana057) October 12, 2023

Turns out a shoe-horn isn't the same thing as a footwear fetish.

— T'Other Simon (@TOther_Simon) October 9, 2023

Trying to quit quoting 90s ragga. I'm just taking it day by day by waddle eye dye.

— James Cook (@jamesecook) October 7, 2023

do you know what, I've had it up to *here* with quicksand

— Toby Earle Threads tobyontv (@TobyonTV) October 11, 2023

It's possible to make multiple wives out of paper using the ancient art of polygami

— Sanjeev Kohli (@govindajeggy) October 11, 2023

What do people who work in a bank actually DO all day?"

"Ah, that would be telling."

— Sean Patrick (@seanptellsjokes) October 11, 2023

"My dog does magic tricks."
"Really? What breed is he?"
"He's a labracadabrador."

— GlennyRodge (@GlennyRodge) October 13, 2023

If you've never had your car stolen in France... you don't know voiture missing.

— Paul Eggleston (@pauleggleston) October 10, 2023

Published: 13 Oct 2023