Drugs, violence and a 'willy brush'

WTF: Weekly Trivia File

‘You get to know plenty of girls through comedy. You know, performers get the girls. Even the bad looking ones.’ Des Bishop

The new I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue book, subtitled The Best of Forty Years, made Amazon’s Top Ten this week... in the ‘History of Europe’ category.

Here’s a warning to all comedians tempted to twat punters on the head with their microphone. Human car-crash Katt Williams is being sued by an audience member he hit with his mic at a comedy show he managed to squeeze in between all his legal problems. Carlos Castro-Lino is seeking at least $250,000 for the ‘assault’, which he says cased him concussion and ‘severe emotional distress’ and says he is ‘likely to suffer long-term impact’ from the incident.The lawsuit also claims that Williams had ‘publicly demonstrated signs of mental instability’ that should have been a warning sign to the owners of Seattle’s Paramount Theatre, who are also being sued. For his part, Williams is said to have pounced because Castro-Lino was allegedly illegally recording his show.

Arthur Smith is to take part in the Greenwich Charity Pantomime Horse Race on December 23. It’s not know which half of the horse he will take.

Forget training dogs, it seems comics are the best at sniffing out drugs. Less than a month after US comedian Jake Weisman found cocaine on a heckler in New Orleans, Adam Newman discovered some more when going through a punter’s pocket in Atlanta:

Scottish comic and internet hit The Wee Man is to take on Tommy Sheridan in the boxing ring. The former socialist MSP has recently turned to pugilism after serving time for perjury and previously announced a bout with ex-pro featherweight Ian McLeod – though we can find no record of any result. The charity match takes place in St Patrick’s Hall in Coatbridge on December 19, fight fans.

Richard Herring had an embarrassing moment when his bank asked him to to confirm his recent purchases, after his debit-card was targeted by fraudsters. For his last legitimate purchase was a ‘willy brush’ – which he claims to have bought because of his penis-related show Talking Cock. Makers hope the personal hygiene device will one day become as common in the bathroom as the toothbrush. After confirming the purchase ‘There was an awkward air of silent judgment on the end of the line,’ Herring reveals in his Metro column today.

John Cleese is selling off his 1987 Bentley Eight after 25 years – and has promised to take the buyer out to dinner. Cleese – who has huge alimony bills to pay – said: ‘It is the most beautiful car I have ever owned. It’s like driving a Starfighter. It has been utterly reliable and it also removed any sense of haste from my life. You don’t drive it, you guide it.’ Bidding on the eBay auction, which closes on Sunday, has topped £16,000.

Tweets of the week:
Demetri Martin (@DemetriMartin):There is no "I" in "Team", unless you count the vertical part of the "T".
Juliet Meyers (@julietmeyers.): Gerkins are basically sausages made from toads.
Simon Guerrero ‏ (@ fiatpanda ): "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes". The labels on Jeffrey Dahmer's freezer drawers.