WTF: Weekly Trivia File

• 'If you want sexy fans, go to rock’n’roll, because comedy, they are not attractive.' Former Doug Anthony Allstar Tim Ferguson.

• Alan Carr has injured his knee – because he minces too much. ‘I’m serious,’ he said. ‘Because I mince so much my pelvis has become realigned and lop-sided and my femur (thigh bone) has pushed my kneecap forward.’ He’s now undergoing physio to relieve the pressure.

• Meanwhile a pasta chain asked Carr if they could pay him to legally change his name to Alan Carrbonara as part of a publicity drive. The Chatty Man star said: ‘They said, “Don't worry, you can change it back after a month”. Great, so I'll only sound like a complete tit for four weeks.’

• Bill Bailey, who’s playing Bristol’s Ashton Gate Stadium tomorrow, vows: ‘If I can secure a vuvuzela for tomorrow night, I promise to “rearrange” it with a cricket bat.’

• Surely no one would confuse David Mitchell the Peep Show comedian with David Mitchell, the two-times Booker-shortlisted novelist once named by Time magazine as one of the world's 100 most influential people. No one outside of the Gulf News picture desk, that is, who ran this page in today’s newspaper.

• Who says people who book comedians for TV are lazy? Moments after the press release arrives trumpeting Channel 4's new Stand Up For the Week and its core team including Jack Whitehall, Kevin Bridges  and Andi Osho comes one for the new series of Mock The Week  boasting how it is 'showcasing rising stand-up stars such as Jack Whitehall, Kevin Bridges, and Andi Osho'. What diversity...

• Russell Brand has been mulling over what to name any children he might have: ‘I’d just make things up like Razzmatazz or Glitch Knife,’ he said.

• Meanwhile, Peep Show creator Sam Bain tweeted to the ‘real’ David Mitchell yesterday: ‘Just enjoying writing some Peep Show dialogue. You are doing some brilliant acting in my head.’ Mitchell Tweeted back: ‘In which case I’m definitely peaking far too soon in the process.’

• Paul McCartney rang James Corden to go through the intro the actor was recording for his set at the Isle Of Wight festival last weekend. But before the conversation, the former Beatle’s assistants rang to check Corden was ready for the call. ‘One woman rang to say to even take my phone to the toilet,’ said the comic, before adding, charmingly: ‘Imagine if you were backing one out when he rang. I think I'd just be honest and tell him I was laying a bit of cable.’

• Just look at the respect the America's Got Talent audience show for stand-up comedy. One gag is all they gave this poor sap before drowning him our with boos:
  

• The New York Mets have apologised to Jerry Seinfeld after giving away his private box to Lady Gaga, who wanted to be moved away from paparazzi as she watched the baseball.

• Bernie Clifton was taken to hospital in South Africa when a car ran over his foot. But the 74-year-old, who plays trombone with the England Supporters Band, suffered no more than serious bruising.

• Ever wondered whatever happened to Nineties comedian Dominic Holland? -->

• Surely this award will eclipse the big-money Fosters prize at this year’s Edinburgh Festival? Organisers of the Malcolm Hardee Award have added a new category for anyone who can juggle cooked spaghetti for 60 seconds in Bristo Square. The prize is a DVD of Alex Reid’s film debut Killer Bitch, which was produced by awards mastermind John Fleming. He said he may also consider giving the prize to anyone who can juggle two babies.

• Meanwhile, the critics vs comedians foootball match has been revived for this year’s Fringe in aid of Amnesty International. The reviewers have starting their sledging well in advance of the August 15 clash at Meadowbank Stadium, with Time Out’s Tim Arthur saying: ‘This match sorts out the men from the boys, or the slackers - who do twenty minutes work a day and then sit around all day whining about why Michael McIntyre is doing better than them - from the hard-working noble journalists who provide an ancient and revered service for the general public. If there's any justice the critics will once again triumph.’ The Guardian’s Brian Logan added: ‘The comedians begrudge us the honest public service we provide, by telling people not to see their shows. And we rage against them for being, err, funnier and more famous than we are. Talk about scores to settle? Now it’s payback time.’

SOURCES: Weekly Review, The Sun, The Sun, Twitter, Gulf News, Chortle, Mirror, Twitter, The Sun, YouTube, Contactmusic.com, Sheffield Star, Chortle, Chortle

Published: 18 Jun 2010