'She was nice and had really big boobs'

The Weekly Triva File

You might have thought he'd find it hard to forget the furore... but top of the set list that Russell Brand scrawled on to his hand for his work-in progress gigs at London's Soho Theatre is one word: Sachs

Meanwhile Mr Brand says he gets starstruck whenever he meets West Ham footballer Mark Noble. 'I can snog Pink or throw Christina Aguilera around a bit, but because Mark plays for West Ham, I develop a squeaky voice and say silly things,' he said. Naturally enough, his Hammers devotion does spill over into his busy sex life, once sleeping with a woman who'd previously bedded former West Ham goalkeeper Phil Parkes. 'I was really into that,' Brand said.' Also she was nice and had really big boobs.'

Still on Brand (is no other comic doing anything this week?), he's said to ready to release the cheesy Chugga Chuuga Song, written by his sidekick Joby Haret for his ill-fated Radio 2 show Russell Brand – with Simon Cowell's Syco Records reportedly keen to release it.

Russell said: 'Joby is a Jelly Baby Jesus and Chugga Chugga can solve every global malady, from economic decline to the ongoing Carlos Tevez saga. Just Chugga Chugga... it'll all be okay.' Here's the song:

Dame Edna Everage says her eye shadow colour is 'Varicose Violet - inspired by my mother's legs'.

Jim Jeffries isn't the only comedian to be punched in the head by a heckler. Here's a 21-year-old stand-up getting attacked while discussing the hugely controversial topic of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles video game...

Ricky Gervais has gone overboard with security at his house in Hampstead, north London, to keep out obsessed fans. He said: 'I’ve turned it into one big panic room. It has steel shutters like James Bond. If I could have lasers, I would. We’ve got security cameras – and if you come near my house I could put you on YouTube.'

Bill Bailey has been travelling to gigs in a Mercedes that runs on old chip fat in an attempt to be more environmentally friendly, as an experiment for Five's Fifth Gear show.

Paul Whitehouse was spotted in the audience of Stewart Lee's Comedy Show, being recorded for BBC Two in London this week; while Stephen Fry has been watching Cate Blanchett in Shakespeare in Sydney.

Happy Days is to be remade as a porn film, thanks to those good people at Hustler. Perhaps inspired by the recent news the Cosbys was to be given the X-rated treatment, The Fonz, Richie Cunningham and the gang are to be revived for This Ain't Happy Days XXX.

SOURCES: Daily Mail, FourFourTwo, Essex Chornicle, The Age Melbourne, YouTube, tourdates.co.uk, Daily Star, Daily Mirror, Contactmusic.com

Published: 16 Jan 2009