The Big Ask: Can you come up with a slogan for the Fringe?

Come up with a slogan? I'm not doing that again. Lost my job at the Staines tourist board. Apparently 'Come Staines' wasn't suitable. Darren Walsh, Massive Punt, Just The Tonic: Little Kirk, 18:00

Like comedy? Like white people? Like a city with an underlying air of jealousy and hatred for a month? Try the Edinburgh Fringe Festival! Tom Lucy, Reluctant Millennial, Pleasance Courtyard, 20:15

Escape into the minds of weird comedians at an affordable price! Ell Sachs, The Travelling Sisters: Toupé, Gilded Balloon Teviot, 18:15

Come to the fringe, there are over 3000 quests for validation to enjoy! Scott Bennett, Leap Year, Just The Tonic At The Mash House, 17:55

The Fringe – It’s like an arts utopia except it’s really expensive and rains all the time and by week three everyone wants to kill themselves. Brett Goldstein, What Is Love Baby Don't Hurt Me, Pleasance Beneath, 19:00

It's Where Everything Begins Pierre Novellie, See Novellie, Hear Novellie, Speak Novellie, Pleasance Courtyard, 19:15

Fringe, too big to fail. Alison Spittle, Worrier Princess, Gilded Balloon, 17:15

The Fringe: Get a whole year's worth of culture in a long weekend. Adele Cliff, Sheep, The Caves, 16:10

Edinburgh fringe. Come see sad comedians in the wild. Ashley Haden, We all Die C*nts, Harry's Southside, 20:45

Summer. Now with 50 per cent more rain. Bryony Twydle, Flamingo, Underbelly Med Quad, 20:30

Be Afraid. Be Delightfully Afraid. Stanley Brooks, AAA Stand-up at Underbelly, Underbelly Cowgate, 18:20

If you thought you were weird... Marny Godden, Marny Town, The Hive, 18:20

Check out a new show at the Fringe, or I don't know, stay home and binge Friends for the fifth time for some reason. Anesti Danelis, Songs For A New World Order, Laughing Horse @ The Hanover Tap, 12:00

It’s the biggest arts festival in the world. Other cities would die to have this so get off your arse and see something. Christian Talbot, Desperately Seeking Approval, Finnegan’s Wake, 12:00

Come to Embra, the month before Septembra Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre, Superheroes, Gilded Balloon, 22:30

Indulge Dickheads This August. Nick Elleray, It's Been Emotional, Just the Tonic at The Grassmarket Centre, 16:40

Come to the fringe so you don't get lost in the middle Barry Ferns, Barry Loves You, The Tron, 21:00

Stop denying yourself pure joy Tom Houghton, The Honourable Tom Houghton, Pleasance Jack Dome, 20:10

Laugh yourself silly watching desperate open mic comedians like us try to compete with successful television comedians in the pissing rain (it's in Scotland, but don't let that put you off!) Will Dalrymple, Pity Laughs: A Tale Of Two Gays, Just Up The Stairs @ Just The Tonic, 16:05

Engage with mental illness in a 'safe' environment. Alexander Bennett, Housewives' Favourite, Waverley Bar, 19:30

Watch comedians try to attract fame and attention in methods as desperate and effective as pagans performing human sacrifices in exchange for a good harvest. Struan Logan, Struan All Over the World, Counting House: Attic, 18:05

The Edinburgh Fringe - where the sun don't shine and any show is good after a bottle of wine. Aaron Calvert, Declassified, Gilded Balloon at the Museum, 18:00

Everyone with something still to prove is there. Laura Lexx, Trying, Gilded Balloon, 17:15

Dive in, surprise yourself, see something new. Naomi Paxton, Ada Campe And The Psychic Duck, The Stand's New Town Theatre, 14:50

The Edinburgh Festival Fringe - it's better than other types of festival cos you don't have to pretend to know who cool bands are. Emmy Fyles, Live Your Best Life, Hanover Tap, 13:15

The Edinburgh Fringe: You won't regret it as much as I do. Sarah Keyworth, Dark Horse, Pleasance: Bunker Two, 17:30

Edinburgh fringe - it will change your life. It changed mine. (I just won’t specify whether for better or worse - that depends on whether you’re talking to me or my parents) Juliette Burton, Butterfly Effect, Gilded Balloon, 16:15

Published: 16 Aug 2018