...and Chloe Radcliffe will even let Gen Z think they discovered it

‘I know not with what videos the next app will be populated, but the app after that will be populated with sticks and stones’
- Albert Einstein, if he was still alive, probably

Sometimes when I feel like getting drunk, I just scroll on my phone for too long. Does the same trick: my vision gets blurry, I lose my balance when I stand up, I’m sad/horny enough to text my ex. 

And I’m only on my phone A LOT, not LITERALLY CONSTANTLY, like the generation below me. (I’m still young, if Mr. Hollywood is reading this.) 

I assume that Kids These Days™ are in a scroll-fog all the time without even realising, like my friend who took a break from drinking and said: ‘I thought I just didn’t like waking up, turns out I’ve been hungover every morning…’

We are due for a genuine, widespread re-embracing of live entertainment. And not just because some cataclysmic climate event knocks out all electricity, so the only options we have are stand-up without a mic or Charades.

Look, I participate in the social-media-video-industrial complex: I post my clips, I root for people to get into fights in the comments so it gets more views. I know that 90 per cent of entertainment now is watching videos on our little screen while a Twitch stream plays on our medium screen and the Roku home menu slowly loops on the biggest screen. We are jelly donuts crammed full of video content until it squirts out our seams (my Fringe show talks about sex, can you tell).

But live shows just do a different thing: they let you get actually drunk. Aaaaaand more importantly: they create participation in the room, not just the voyeurism of watching someone chew on tinfoil into a microphone, you absolute freaks.

Our video addiction will get worse before it gets better. But we’re social creatures, and I think sooner or later, some tastemaker is going to build the ultimate ‘you had to be there’ brand around the exclusivity of live shows. 

I’ll even let Gen Z think they discovered the concept of live performance, just like they discovered Kate Bush. Imagine! A comedy show where the audience had to lock their phones in pouches and the comics couldn’t tape their sets, not because a celebrity was workshopping new jokes, but because this was a special event not for access by the plebs of Instagram. 

All these ideas I bequeath to you for free, O Internet, don’t say I never gave you anything. 

To be honest, I’m pulling for a bigger revolt against the poison juice of social media as a whole. And until then, don’t forget to smash that Like button!!

Tastemakers are nothing if not willing to pendulum swing. (I spent two years getting used to pants that ended awkwardly high above my ankles and now they’re supposed to puddle on the ground? Please, have mercy, let me stop buying different pants) So I’m waiting for the pendulum to swing from video content back to a love affair with live entertainment. And until then, I’ll keep drinking* alone.

*scrolling**

**I mean, probably drinking too

• Chloe Radcliffe’s debut Edinburgh Fringe stand-up show Cheat will be at the Pleasance Courtyard at 7.15pm from August 2 to 28.

Published: 11 Jul 2023